How my body aches!
The tyrant shore's heaviness
drugs my tired limbs.
My throat is raw from breathing in
this unfamiliar, unseen nothing.
How can I not be exhausted
from such sustained effort
merely to remain alive
in this alien world of air?
Now dawn's silent light
has snared me,
has cast a silken net
across my glistening skin,
tight and unforgiving.
How can I know
how much time has passed
since I stranded here?
A single night?
A cycle of the white and silent moon?
A thousand years?
I recall stories of others of my kind,
washed ashore and becoming something other,
both less and more than they had been.
They never returned.
But in my struggle with the tides,
with the tug and slide of currents,
with life itself,
even in my struggle with this cruel nothing,
which cracks my throat with every breath,
I am resolved.
I will not become as those
whose lives are lived
in this unfamiliar, alien world of air.
I will not become something
other than who I truly am.
And so I mark my time.
I will wait patiently in this pain of dawn
I will wait in the sun's heat soon to come
I will wait curled up, unmoving:
a silken shadow where no shadows fall.
I will wait until some kind and trusting tide
returns me to my ocean home
in a single night,
or in a cycle of the white and silent moon,
or in a thousand years.
How could I live in this alien air?
How could my feet tread this alien earth?
I am as patient as the tides,
as inscrutable as my Mother Ocean
whose child I am
forever.
As I read this writing I sense the feel of what life must be when you come from the sea and must survive on the land and be exposed to the open air. The skin no longer holding its way and the heart forever yearning to be home under the waves. Grasping for the comfort of living below the sea in lieu of walking, talking and moving on two legs with feet pounding against the solid soil of hard ground. Nothing like the flow and fluidity of free motion, an ability to live with no resistance, to move with the tides and dive deep along side of the whales. You are a child of Mother Ocean and your spirit will always be found deep within the depths of the sea. This is beautiful Emma, beautiful.
ReplyDeleteDearest Deborah, I feel deep gratitude for your words here. Thank you for such a profound understanding. ♥
DeleteI remember when we could breathe the water like it was air.. my fondest memory there was listening to you sing across the waters, listening to your stories of the way the moon would dance... or the way the dragonfly would stand upon the waters as they lapped a gentle and sweet song sounding.... always your heart moved me to sing and echoing love song in return.. always as it does now... always and forever... in love.. and grace.. your mermaid sister... singing with you across the waters ...
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